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https://www.infirmiere-canadienne.com/blogs/ic-contenu/2026/03/09/sandwichs-pour-tout-le-monde

I got scolded for giving a little food from the ER fridge to someone who needed it

By Sheri McPhee
March 9, 2026

The world’s worst sandwiches are kept in an ER fridge. They are tasteless and dry to the point of creating a choking hazard, yet I got yelled at once by my charge nurse for giving a patient one of the sandwiches. She hollered at me in front of dozens of people lining the triage hall, a show for the paramedics. It seems I was ‘encouraging bums’ to ‘hang around the ER.’ I offered the patient a late-night meal as they waited for a turn in the queue. Her name was Virginia. She was unwashed, unhoused, intoxicated and hungry. High crimes in a busy ER.

The charge nurse did not speak, but spat at me asking, “Who authorized you to give her that sandwich?” The sandwich that was outdated and destined for a garbage can at the end of the night. I had no words as I watched the charge nurse bristle. She seemed to froth when she spoke. I felt hypnotized by the gold cross that dangled from her neck, and I steadied for a fight. Her eyes bugged and our stare down seemed to last forever. In a fit of obstinance, I marched past her and back to the refrigerator where I took two more sandwiches and tucked them in Virginia’s coat.

Food insecurity

Who are the patient sandwiches intended for? If not Virginia, then who? She, like 20% of Canadians, lives with food insecurity (Uppal, 2023). People don’t have enough to eat, and it’s caused by a multitude of reasons, most notably poverty, access to food, and unfavourable government policies (Uppal, 2023). There are other reasons, of course. Think of your papa eating nothing more than tea and toast. The working mother who only eats potato chips for lunch. The busy child that can’t sit and focus through school. The university student who just moved to Canada. The person that served you coffee at the drive-through. Many of these people did not eat enough food today to meet their needs.

My charge nurse, like many health-care professionals, don’t know that food security is a problem or don’t appreciate how widespread it is. They may think that it isn’t their department, or that it’s someone else’s job to address (Douglas, Machray, & Entwistle, 2019). My patient not only needed food that night, but she also needed some kindness, empathy and compassion. If all ills could be cured with so little.

Values

The values of kindness, compassion and empathy have shaped my nursing career. My dad’s favourite saying was “it’s just as easy to be nice.” Indeed, it is. It’s easy to be kind and caring. It’s also a fundamental value to health care (Cochrane, 2019). Kindness, too, is important to our health care. When care providers act compassionately, there are increased positive health outcomes (Greco et al., 2025). More research is being conducted on the value, but studies show that when a culture of kindness is promoted, there are better patient outcomes and less stress among the health-care workers (Greco et al., 2025). The goal of providing compassionate care is a tenet in the ethics of nurses (Cochrane et al., 2019). This is one of the reasons I became a nurse. To help and care for others. As a nurse, I am ethically bound to be compassionate (Cochrane et al., 2019). Not only does it feel good, it is our duty.

The night in the ER, I didn’t have much to offer my patient other than a little kindness and some compassion. I was able to show her empathy by offering a meal. If she could at least have one good day, I felt I had accomplished something. Kindness, compassion and empathy are the values that should guide our work. Technology aside, as nurses we often only need our heads, hands and heart to make a difference.

Analysis

Values influence goals, strategies and actions (Shahriari et al., 2013). Empathy is a pillar in building connections (Greco et al., 2025). To me, empathy is essential for making connections with patients like that hungry patient that night in the ER. We ought to listen without judgment. Kindness and compassion are required values in health care (Cochrane et al., 2019). Empathy fosters trust and collaboration but can also lead to burnout or compassion fatigue (Shahriari et al., 2013; Douglas, Machray, & Entwistle, 2019).

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Burnout, excessive workloads and limited personal connections may be cause for a nurse to suffer from compassion fatigue. Lack of compassion may lead to errors, poor experiences, broken trust and inevitably, poor health outcomes (Cochrane et al., 2019). Working under pressure with tight deadlines may lead a health-care worker to falter. It has been argued that compassion is more important than ever (Cochrane et al., 2019). I couldn’t agree more. In a compassionate care model, patients are treated as individuals. It finds its basis in love and vulnerability (Cochrane et al., 2019). Compassion motivates health-care providers. While it can be challenging, it is also very rewarding (Greco et al., 2025).

The opposite of empathy is apathy. Apathy is to have a lack of interest, concern or feelings of detachment and is a characteristic of burnout. To be empathetic is to be kind, considerate and helpful, putting oneself in another’s situation (Greco et al., 2025). Compassionate care begins with self-awareness. A natural extension of kindness, it is to meet others where they are, giving from the heart (Cochrane et al., 2019). It is critical for a nurse to be aware of their values and how this affects their actions. It is a core in providing patient-centred care (Shahriari et al., 2013).

Acting with a kind heart is to be warm. It promotes well-being and supports actions that benefit others. To be kind is to be friendly, generous and considerate, leading to trust through mutual understanding (Greco et al., 2025). The foundation of health care remains in relationships. Those who show kindness create more trust and the supportive environments where people feel valued and heard (Greco et al., 2025). This is my daily goal.

Values of compassion, kindness and empathy guide my practice, and I strive to focus on understanding without judgment or criticism. These values promote change through inquiry and empowerment. Respecting human dignity is at the heart of social justice (Greco et al., 2025). Social justice considers dignity and respect, focusing on equal access to health-care services and equality of care (Shahriari et al., 2019). We do this with a warm heart. We do this by giving space for compassion. Sandwiches for all.

References

Cochrane, B. S., Ritchie, D., Lockhard, D., Picciano, G., King, J. A., & Nelson, B. (2019). A culture of compassion: How timeless principles of kindness and empathy become powerful tools for confronting today's most pressing healthcare challenges. Healthcare Management Forum, 32(3), 120-127. https://doi.org/10.1177/0840470419836240

Douglas, F., Machray, K., & Entwistle, V. (2019). Health professionals' experiences and perspectives on food insecurity and long-term conditions: A qualitative investigation. Health Social Care Community. 28(2), 404-413. https://doi.org/10.1111/hsc.12872

Greco, A., González-Ortiz, L. G., Gabutti, L., et al. (2025). What's the role of kindness in the healthcare context? A scoping review. BMC Health Serv Res 25, 207. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12913-025-12328-1

Shahriari, M., Mohammadi, E., Abbaszadeh, A., & Bahrami, M. (2013). Nursing ethical values and definitions: A literature review. Iranian Journal of Nursing and Midwifery Research. 18(1) 1-8. PMID: 23983720; PMCID: PMC3748548.

Uppal, S. (2023). Food security among Canadian families. Insights on Canadian Society. Statistics Canada. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/pub/75-006-x/2023001/article/00013-eng.htm

Sheri McPhee, RN, MN, NP, is a PhD student and sessional lecturer at the University of Saskatchewan College of Nursing.

#analysis
#equity-social-justice
#intra-professional-collaboration
#nurse-patient-relationship
#nursing-practice
#patient-care
#patient-experience